I Once Dated A Girl That Was

One Year They Asked Me To Be Poster Boy - For Birth Control.

I Shouldn't Tell Jokes About My Wife. She's Attached To A Machine That Keeps Her Alive... The Refrigerator.

I Told My Doctor I Got Water On My Knee, He Gave Me A Sponge And Raised His Fee!

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. I Told My Mother, I'm Gonna Run Away From Home. She Said, On Your Mark.

Well With Girls I Don't Get No Respect. I Had A Blind Date. I Waited Two Hours On The Corner. A Girl Walked By. I Said Are You Louise? She Said, Are You Rodney? I Said, Yeah. She Said, I'm Not Louise.