You Might Be A Redneck If You

Nowadays You Can't Even Spank Your Kids. No, Gotta Give 'em A Time Out. My Dad Would Take Time Out Of His Busy Day... To Whip Our Ass.

You Might Be A Redneck If You See A Sign That Says Say No To Crack And It Reminds You To Pull Your Jeans Up.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Have Refused To Watch The Academy Awards Since Smokey And The Bandit Was Snubbed For Best Picture.

If You Have Ever Spray-painted Your Girlfriends Name On An Overpass, You Might Be A Redneck.

Please Don't Get Me Wrong Here. I'm Not Making Fun Of Old People. In Fact I Think That's The Goal Of Everybody Here Tonite. We All Want To Be An Old Person Someday.