By The Time We Get To Church,

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Daughter's Barbie's Dream House Has A Clothesline In The Front Yard.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Think People That Send Out Graduation Announcements Are Show-offs.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Grandfather Completely Executes The Pull My Finger Trick At The Family Reunion.

I've Got Nothing Against Tattoos. I Don't Have One Myself. If I Did, It Would Be Right There Next To My Watch. It Would Say "your Wife's Birthday Is August 2nd, Your Anniversary Is September 18th, Don't Let Ron White Drive Your Car Again."

You Might Be A Redneck If The Ufo Hotline Limits You To One Call A Day.