You Might Be A Redneck If...you Think

In My Life, I Have Driven Some Crappy Vehicles. But I Have Never Been So Desperate For A Vehicle That I Wanted A Used Rental Car.

I'm Two Decisions Away From Putting Up Drywall For A Living. I Am, And There's Nothing Wrong With That, But Whatever I Got, It's Through The Grace Of God, And I've Got To Use It Right.

I Tried Real Hard To Play Golf, And I Was So Bad At It They Would Have To Check Me For Ticks At The End Of The Round Because I'd Spent About Half The Day In The Woods.

Have You Ever Seen People So Ugly That You Have To Get Someone Else To Verify It?

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Grandmother Can Correctly Execute The Sleeper Hold.