They Just Elected Me Mis Phonograph Record

My Timing Is So Precise, A Heckler Would Have To Make An Appointment Just To Get A Word In.

Life Began On This Planet When The First Amoeba Split. Mankind Will Still Be Seeking God, Not Accepting That God Is A Spirit; Can't See It, Touch It, Only Feel It. It's Called Love.

There's Such A Buildup Of Crud In My Oven, There's Only Room To Bake A Single Cupcake.

I Have Nothing Against Dogs. I Just Hate Rugs That Go Squish-squish.

I'm At An Age When My Back Goes Out More Than I Do.