The Only People Who Say Worse Things

Soap, Like People, Shouldn't Smell Like Anything.

I Don't Like Food That's Too Carefully Arranged; It Makes Me Think That The Chef Is Spending Too Much Time Arranging And Not Enough Time Cooking. If I Wanted A Picture I'd Buy A Painting.

We've Sent A Man To The Moon And That's 29,000 Miles Away. The Center Of The Earth Is Only 4,000 Miles Away. You Could Drive That In A Week But For Some Reason Nobody's Ever Done It.

Democrats Believe People Are Basically Good But Must Be Saved From Themselves By The Government. Republicans Believe People Are Basically Bad But They'll Be Okay If They're Left Alone.

Christians Talk As Though Goodness Was Their Idea But Good Behavior Doesn't Have Any Religious Origin. Our Prisons Are Filled With The Devout.