The Conductor Is A Peculiar Person. He

Did You Know That Mozart Had No Arms And No Legs? I've Seen Statues Of Him On People's Pianos.

One Afternoon, When I Was Four Years Old, My Father Came Home, And He Found Me In The Living Room In Front Of A Roaring Fire, Which Made Him Very Angry. Because We Didn't Have A Fireplace.

What Soap Is To The Body, Laughter Is To The Soul. Laughter Is The Shortest Distance Between Two People.

(responding To A Sneeze From The Audience) Who Exploded?

If I Have Caused Just One Person To Wipe Away A Tear Of Laughter, That's My Reward.