That Punt Was Higher Than Marion Berry

The Punt Returner Got Smacked Like Nancy Kerrigan's Knee On Souvenir Pipe Night.

Human Beings Are Human Beings. They Say What They Want, Don't They? They Used To Say It Across The Fence While They Were Hanging Wash. Now They Just Say It On The Internet.

I Am Proof That Einstein's "e Equals M C Squared" Is Wrong. My Mass Has Increased, But My Energy Has Dropped.

A Good Rule Of Thumb Is If You've Made It To 35 And Your Job Still Requires You Wear A Nametag, You've Probably Made A Serious Vocational Error.

It's Your Living Room, It's Your Life, Go Nuts. You Like Home Improvement? Tape It And Go Over It Like It's The Zapruder Film.