People Would Pay Money To Work At

Nobody Beats A Bunch Of Journalists For Inflating Their Rather Mundane Straightforward Chores With A Lot More Melodrama And Self-importance Than The Job Should Be Asked To Contain.

You Know What Amazes Me About Ufo's? They Never Land At The White House. They Always Land At Laramie, Wyoming. Thiry Miles Out, Where They're Seen By One Farmer.

If You Do Something, Expect Consequences

All Of My Life Doing Interviews, Comedy Has Been My Favorite Thing, Comedians Are My Favorite People.

I Remind Myself Every Morning: Nothing I Say This Day Will Teach Me Anything. So If I'm Going To Learn, I Must Do It By Listening.