People Are Dreaming If They Think They

Laugh Often, Long And Loud. Laugh Until You Gasp For Breath.

Regarding The Fitness Craze: America Has Lost Its Soul; Now It's Trying To Save Its Body.

I Noticed That All The Prayers I Used To Offer To God, And All The Prayers I Now Offer To Joe Pesci, Are Being Answered At About The Same 50% Rate. Half The Time I Get What I Want, Half The Time I Don't... Same As The Four-leaf Clover And The Horseshoe...same As The Voodoo Lady Who Tells You Your Fortune By Squeezing The Goat's Testicles, It's All The Same: 50-50. So Just Pick Your Superstition, Sit Back, Make A Wish, And Enjoy Yourself.

If You Nail A Tool Shed Closed, How Do You Put The Hammer Away?

In Most Polls There Are Always About 5 Percent Of The People Who 'don't Know.' What Isn't Generally Understood Is That It's The Same People In Every Poll.