My Real Last Name Is Galifianakisburg.

It's Not Good For Comedy To Be Like, 'thanks For Liking Me'. Being Popular Is Poison.

I'm Greek. My Body Produces Feta Cheese.

I Find Anger To Be Funny. I Find People That Are So Wrapped Up In Their Own Personalities To Be Funny, And Lost. Like Myself In Real Life.

I Like To Read The Bible In Public Places Where People Are Watching Me Read It. And I Like To Mumur Out To Myself: 'bullshit!'

I've Never Been In Love... But I Imagine It's Similar To The Feeling You Get When You See Your Waiter Arriving With Your Food