It's A Good Thing That Beauty Is

I Was In A Beauty Contest Once. I Not Only Came In Last, I Was Hit In The Mouth By Miss Congeniality.

My Idea Of Exercise Is A Good Brisk Sit.

By Far The Most Common Craving Of Pregnant Women Is Not To Be Pregnant.

Once My Husband Said To Me, 'i'm Going To Have Some Coffee. Do You Want Me To Put Some Hot Water On For You?' I Thought That Was The Least He Could Do Considering I Was Giving Birth.

My Plastic Surgeon ... Said My Face Looked Like A Bouquet Of Elbows.