I'm Really Happy. I Just Don't Choose

I've Always Wanted To Kick A Duck Up The Arse

Me In A One-man Tent Crouching Over Carrier Bag. It's Not Just The Lowest Point Of The Trip. It's The Lowest Point Ever. In 38 Years.

It's Not Easy Keeping A Diary. You Have To Be Pretty Committed.

I've Been On The Planet For 40 Years Now, And I'm Still None The Wiser As To What It's All About Really. I've Never Worried About Life's Big Questions. People At My Age Sit About Pondering, 'why Are We Here?' The Only Time I Ever Asked Myself That Is When Suzanne Booked Us A Surprise Holiday To Lanzarote.

Whether It's A Potato Or A Nut, It's A Foodage!