I'm Eighteen Years Behind In My Ironing.

My Father Used To Call Me The Laughing Hyena.

There Isn't Any (afterlife), You Dingbat! This Is It, Baby! Enjoy, Carefully! Religion Is Such A Medieval Idea. Don't Get Me Started. I Have Thought About Every Facet Of Religion And I Can't Buy Any Of It. So God Made Man In His Own Image? It's Just The Other Way Around. Man Made God In His Own Image. It's All About Money.

A Stand-up Comic Is Judged By Every Line. Singers Get Applause At The End Of Their Song No Matter How Bad They Are.

Your Husband Is Lazy If Coffee Doesn't Keep Him Awake - Even When It's Hot And Being Spilled On Him.

My Recipe For Dealing With Anger And Frustration: Set The Kitchen Timer For Twenty Minutes, Cry, Rant, And Rave, And At The Sound Of The Bell, Simmer Down And Go About Business As Usual.