I'm A Double Bagger. Not Only Does

My Face Has Been Tucked In More Times Than A Bedsheet At The Holiday Inn.

If You Don't Go To Broadway, You're A Fool. On Broadway, Off Broadway, Above Broadway, Below Broadway, Go! Don't Tell Me There Isn't Something Wonderful Playing. If I'm Home In New York At Night, I'm Either At A Broadway Or An Off Broadway Show. We're In The Theater Capital Of The World, And If You Don't Get It, You're An Idiot.

My Body Is Dropping So Fast, My Gynecologist Wears A Hard Hat.

I Have No Boobs Whatsoever. On My Wedding Night My Husband Said, 'let Me Help You With Those Buttons' And I Told Him, 'i'm Completely Naked'.

I Lived To Be On Stage, And I'm Terrified. Terrified Before Every Show.