Girls Just Want To Have Fun. Well,

Run Scared ... And They Never Catch You.

Learn What Not To Expect. Irish Catholic They Get Sh**** Little Rings. Irish Women Get Crappy Rings. Baptist Get The Worst Because They Get The Rings Under Water. When It Comes Up, It's Garbage. Jewish, Big Rings. Episcopalian Big Rings. Italians-the Best, Because They Get Them Off Of Dead People, And Second Wives Get The Biggest Rings Of All.

In Life The Only Thing That You Can Expect Is The Unexpected; The Only Surprise Is A Day That Has None.

I Can't Wear Yellow Anymore. It's Too Matchy-matchy With My Catheter.

If You Don't Want Gays In The Military, Make The Uniforms Ugly.