You Can't Tell Me The Success Of

I Am Single, I Don't Drink. It's Kind Of Hard To Get A Woman Buzzed When You Don't Drink. You'll Be Like, "yeah, I'll Have A Glass Of Water, You Want A Shot Of Jäger? You Want Eight Of 'em?"

You Ever Read An Article, And At The Bottom, It Says, 'continued On Page Six'? I'm , 'not For Me. I'm Done.'

There's A Certain Balance Between Finding An Opportunity To Do What You Really Enjoy And Getting Caught Up In The Flattery Of People Wanting You To Do Things.

My Comedy Is Romanticized Laziness.

Who Was The First Person To Walk Into A Harbor And Say, "whatever That Horrible Smell Is I Want To Eat It"