You Can't Ignore Politics, No Matter How

If His Iq Slips Any Lower, We'll Have To Water Him Twice A Day

He Was So Narrow Minded He Could See Through A Keyhole With Both Eyes.

There Are Two Kinds Of Humor. One Kind That Makes Us Chuckle About Our Foibles And Our Shared Humanity -- Like What Garrison Keillor Does. The Other Kind Holds People Up To Public Contempt And Ridicule -- That's What I Do. Satire Is Traditionally The Weapon Of The Powerless Against The Powerful. I Only Aim At The Powerful. When Satire Is Aimed At The Powerless, It Is Not Only Cruel -- It's Vulgar.

Texas Is A Fine Place For Men And Dogs, But Hell On Women And Horses.

The First Rule Of Holes: When You're In One Stop Digging.