The Best Christmas Trees Come Very Close

Have You Noticed That They Put Advertisements In With Your Bills Now? Like Bills Aren't Distasteful Enough, They Have To Stuff Junk Mail In There With Them. I Get Back At Them. I Put Garbage In With My Check When I Mail It In. Coffee Grinds, Banana Peels...i Write, "could You Throw This Away For Me?"

I've Learned... That I Can Always Pray For Someone When I Don't Have The Strength To Help Him In Some Other Way.

As An Old Reporter, We Have A Few Secrets, And The First Thing Is We Try The Phone Book.

I Believe The Money I Make Belongs To Me And My Family, Not Some Governmental Stooge With A Bad Comb-over Who Wants To Give It Away To Crack Addicts For Squirting Out Babies.

I Just Sat There Looking At Television, Sort Of Dumb And Thought How Horrible It Was. I Had -- The Grand Aspects Of It Did Not Occur To Me -- I Had No Notion Of This Terrorist Network That Existed. I Knew The Were A Lot Of People In The World Who Didn't Like Us, But I Had No Idea That It Was As Well Organized As It Apparently Is. That's One Of The Amazing Facets Of This Terrible Event: How Well They Did It. Incredible. The Competence Of These Evil People.