That's Ended, That's Over. I Want You

I Love The Tea Party. They Are The Ultimate Beer Goggles. They Make Everything Look Better.

Sarah Palin Has Already Had An Effect On Foreign Relations... The New President Of Pakistan, Ali Zardari, Is In Hot Water, Because Last Week, Sarah Was On A Class Trip To New York, Where She Met Foreign Leaders... And One Of The Leaders She Met Was Zardari, And He Was Gushing Over Her. He Said, Oh, You're More Gorgeous In Person Than You Are On Tv. And So The People In His Home Country Of Pakistan, The Islamists, They Issued A Fatwa On Him, For Being Too 'flirty.' And When Sarah Today Was Told That Zardari Had Gotten A Fatwa Because Of Her, She Said, 'i Know, I Felt It When He Hugged Me.'

If You Think You Have It Tough, Read History Books.

Married Men Live Longer. Yes. And An Indoor Cat Also Lives Longer. It's A Furball With A Broken Spirit, That Can Only Look Out On A World It Can Never Enjoy. But It Does Technically Live Longer.

The Teachers Don't Know Anything. What Are The Kids Going To Learn With A Horrible Education System?