My Girlfriend Bought A Cook Book The

Tv's Not The Same Buzz. If Someone Tells You Three Million People Watched The Show Last Week, That's Good But, When You Walk Out In Front Of 1,000, You Think, 'oh My God, This Had Better Be Good'.

I Was Out With A Friend And He Came Over With A Pair Of Girls. I Said To Him "they're Like Buses." He Said "what? Because You Wait For Ages And Then Two Come Along At Once." I Said "no, They Are Like Buses!"

More People Are Going Out To Comedy Shows Than They Were Before.

I Think The Idea That Death Is Not The End, That Your Dog's Just Gone To Live On The Farm, Is Limiting. Thoughts Like That Prevent You From Making The Most Of The Time That You Have.

British Scientists Have Demonstrated That Cigarettes Can Harm Your Children. Fair Enough. Use An Ashtray!