It's Funny, When Bands Or Younger Musicians

I Went To The Zoo One Day And Saw A Chimp Playing With A Beat-up Acoustic Guitar In A Way I Had Never Seen Before. Instead Of Using The Pick The Chimp Was Banging The Neck And Tapping It With Its Fingers. I Knew The Chimp Was On To Something So I Practiced This New Technique In My Room For Hours Until I'd Perfected It.

Sometimes I Just Want To Lick David Lee Roth In The Nuts

David Lee Roth Had The Idea That If You Covered A Successful Song, You Were Half Way Home. C'mon - Van Halen Doing 'dancing In The Streets'? It Was Stupid. I Started Feeling Like I Would Rather Bomb Playing My Own Songs Than Be Successful Playing Someone Else's Music.

If You Want To Be A Rock Star Or Just Be Famous, Then Run Down The Street Naked, You'll Make The News Or Something. But If You Want Music To Be Your Livelihood, Then Play, Play, Play And Play! And Eventually You'll Get To Where You Want To Be.

I'm Just A Guitarist In A Kick-ass Rock And Roll Band. What More Could I Ask For?