Insecurity Breeds Treachery: If You Are Kind

In Its Purest Sense, Nicknaming Is An Elitist Ritual Practiced By Those Who Cherish Hierarchy. For Preppies It's A Smoke Signal That Allows Bunny To Tell Pooky That They Belong To The Same Tribe, While Among The Good Old Boys It Serves The Cause Of Masculine Dominance By Identifying Bear And Wrecker As Alpha Males.

Thank God I'm Over The Hill. The Only Heat I Have Left Comes From Hot Flashes, My Promiscuity Is Confined To The Words "one Size Fits All," And I Buy My White Cotton Unmentionables At Boadicea's Retreat, Not Victoria's Secret. None Of The Things Men Do To Women Could Possibly Happen To Me Now Unless The U.s. Is Invaded By One Of Those New Russian Republics Whose Soldiers Aren't Fussy.

In Mississippi The Important Thing Is Hooch, Not Bar Equipment.

Kings And Queens Might Do Wicked Things, But They Don't Nag. One Thing I Like About Bloody Mary: She Never Said A Word About Lung Cancer.

Self-help Books Are Making Life Downright Unsafe. Women Desperate To Catch A Man Practice All The Ploys Recommended By These Authors. Bump Into Him, Trip Over Him, Knock Him Down, Spill Something On Him, Scald Him, But Meet Him.