I Watch Some Cnn And A Lot

Republicans And Democrats Can Barely Do What They're Supposed To Do, And They Sure Can't Do Math!

When You're Done [with Writing A Book], People Tell You "well, Gee, I'm Not Interested." "great, I'm Glad I Sat Down And Wrote This!"

I Went To New Zealand This Year, And, Whew Man, I Know A Lot Of People Want To Go There. But Let Me Just Tell You, It's 22 Hours By Plane. So, If You Have The Opportunity, Don't.

Whenever Someone Says They Believe The Earth Was Created In 7 Days, I Grab A Fossil And Say, Fossil. And If They Keep Talking, I Throw It Just Over Their Heads.

Political Audiences Are Not Fun.