I'm A Great Lover, I'll Bet.

Ambiguity — The Devil's Volleyball.

When Deciding Between Two Competing Theories, Always Go With The One That Doesn't Involve A Magic Spell.

I Asked My Girlfriend, 'will You Marry Me?' She Said, 'we'll Have To Ask My Father.' So We Had A Seance And Jack Ruby Says, 'hello!'

When I Was A Kid, My Goodness, Corporate America Was A Bunch Of Stolid White Guys In Gray Suits Trying To Be Serious, And Now It's Stolid White Guys In Gray Suits Trying To Be Funny.

I Once Had A Large Gay Following, But I Ducked Into An Alleyway And Lost Him.