I Love People Who Have Such Passion

I Think The People I Talk About Are Generally So Stupid That They Don't Even Know I'm Saying Bad Things About Them. I've Run Into Paris Hilton And She's Like, Oh, I Love Your Show. And I'm Like, You Can't Love My Show If You Can Hear.

In These Tough Economic Times, Everybody Has To Cut Back. I Am Down To Three Tabs Of Ecstasy A Day.

Thanksgiving Is Coming. I Wonder What The Holiday Will Be Like At Dog The Bounty Hunter’s House—obviously, They’ll Have A Turkey With All-white Meat.

The Only People I Owe An Apology To Are My Dead Parents. Except My Father Because He's Still Alive.

Ivory's The Kind Of Girl Who Gets Drunk And Immediately Starts Slurring. I Have A Lot Of Friends Like That, And I Think It's Because It Makes Me Look 'more Together.