Don't Worry. It's Just A Flesh Wound.

I'm Having Trouble Warming Up To Mitt Romney. He Looks Like The Guy In The Restaurant That Comes To Your Table To Make Sure Everything's All Right.

Former President Bush, To Celebrate His 80th Birthday, Jumped Out Of An Airplane. And If You've Seen The Polls, You Know He's Not The Only Bush In Freefall.

Last Night The United States Dropped Four 2,000 Pound Bombs On Saddam Hussein. I Don't Know Anything About Explosives, But, My God, Do Those Things Even Need To Explode?

They're Talking About Putting A Woman On The $20 Bill. And Hillary Said, 'i'm Available.'

I Pulled A Hamstring During The New York City Marathon. An Hour Into The Race, I Jumped Off The Couch.