Does Anyone Really Imagine For A Moment

Unlike Furious Thin-lipped Feminists, I Tend Not To Draw Distinctions Between Men And Women, Apart From In Bed Where You Really Do Need To Spot The Difference.

You Have City Centre Pubs Where Men Go To Meet Girls, Not Realising That All Girls In City Centre Pubs Have Thighs Like Tug Boats And Morals That Would Surprise A Zoo Animal.

Nothing Can Prepare You For The Yawning Chasm Of Time That Passes In Canada Before The Healthcare System Actually Does Any Healthcare.

It Couldn't Pull A Greased Stick Out Of A Pig's Bottom

She Can Take A Year To Read Something, Whereas I Like A Book That Becomes More Important In My Life That Life Itself. When I Was In The Middle Of 'red Storm Rising' By Tom Clancy - Which Was Not Selected For The Man Booker Shortlist - You Could Have Taken My Liver Out And Fed It To The Dog. And I Wouldn't Have Noticed.