As An Old Reporter, We Have A

The Super Bowl Isn't For Kids, I Had A Great Time Though And It Was Worth Every Nickel Of It Because By Doing This Lame Piece About The Game I Can Put It On My Expense Account.

Writers Don't Retire. I Will Always Be A Writer.

I Dislike Loud-mouthed Patriots Who Suggest They Like Our Country More Than I Do. Some People's Idea Of Patriotism Is Hating Other Countries.

There Are Sixteen Cans Of Coffee Here; Together They Hold A Total Of Thirteen And A Half Pounds Of Coffee. Doesn't That Seem Like Cheating?

I Don't Like Food That's Too Carefully Arranged; It Makes Me Think That The Chef Is Spending Too Much Time Arranging And Not Enough Time Cooking. If I Wanted A Picture I'd Buy A Painting.