According To A Survey In This Week's

Yesterday In New York City, Donald Trump Officially Changed His Political Affiliation From Republican To Independent. And Donald's Hair Has Switched From Pelt To Carpet Sample.

There Are Now More Obese People In The United States Than There Are Overweight People. I Think It's Safe To Say That After All These Years, Diet Coke Is A Complete Failure.

At Ken Lay's Funeral Service The Minister Compared Him To Dr. Martin Luther King, Junior. The Difference Is Dr. King Had A Dream, Ken Lay Had A Scheme.

Apparently 26 Years Ago, Arnold Gave An Interview To Oui Magazine About His Sex Life. The Good News Is That Arnold Is Married To Maria Shriver And Now That He's Had A Sex Scandal, The Kennedy Family Has Finally Accepted Him.

You Know Who Must Be Very Secure In Their Masculinity? Male Ladybugs.