According To A Survey In This Week's

British Scientists Say They Have Developed A Super Broccoli That Can Help Fight Heart Disease. You Know, If You Want To Fight Heart Disease, Why Don't You Come Up With A Food People Will Actually Eat? Like A Super Glazed Doughnut.

I Was In The Rotc. Of Course, Rotc Stood For "running Off To Canada."

There's A New Osama Bin Laden Video. He's The Only Person That Is Looking Thin During The Holidays. How Does He Do It? I Think He's Going To Jenny Craig.

We're Heading For A Gov. Shutdown. This Is Serious. W/o The Gov Who Will Fail To Inspect Our Airplanes? Who Will Fail To Secure Our Borders? Who Will Put Us 14 Trillion Dollars In Debt?

You Know Who Boehner Is, Right? He's That Orange Looking Guy. See, For Republicans That Counts As Diversity.