You Know What's Funny To Me? Attitude.

When You Talk About George Burns You're Talking About A Living Legend . . . Well, A Legend, Anyhow.

It Takes Many Years To Be A Great Comedian.

Hell, Do I Remember The First Joke? I Was Never A Jokester.

They Always Use The Word 'insult' With Me, But I Don't Hurt Anybody. I Wouldn't Be Sitting Here If I Did. I Make Fun Of Everybody And Exaggerate All Our Insecurities.

No Matter Where You Go In This World, You Will Always Find A Jew Sitting In The Beach Chair Next To You.