When I Go To Dance Clubs, I

My Material Never Comes Out Verbatim Every Time. I Always Tweak In A Line, Or Tweak Away A Line, Gain A Couple Tags Or Lose A Couple Tags. The Timing Is Always Off.

Being On Tv Sucks. It's A Lot Of Work. You Memorize Scripts And Then You Show Up And They Change Everything. I'm A Control Freak. When I'm Doing Stand-up, I Say What I Want And Then I Get Instant Feedback.

I Have Very Nice Cars. I Never Get To Drive Them, Because I'm Never Home.

Early On When I Started Talking About My Weight, It Was Self-deprecating; Everything Was A Joke.

I Was Very Dirty; I Was A Very Dirty Comic. There Was No Way I Would Have Gotten On Tv With The Act I Had When I First Started.