We Fed 'em Xmas And New Years;

Our Country Has Plenty Of Five-cent Cigars, But The Trouble Is They Charge Fifteen Cents For Them.

If There Are No Dogs In Heaven, Then When I Die I Want To Go Where They Went.

Everybody Is Ignorant, Only On Different Subjects.

Will Rogers Used To Say He Wouldn't Run For President No Matter How Badly The Country Needed A Comedian.

If You Want To Be Successful, It's Just This Simple. Know What You Are Doing. Love What You Are Doing. And Believe In What You Are Doing.