The Word "souvenir" Has, Of Course, Slightly

There Are Many Mysteries In Old Age But The Greatest, Surely, Is This: In Those Adverts For Walk-in Bathtubs, Why Doesn't All The Water Gush Out When You Get In?

The Act Of God Designation On All Insurance Policies; Which Means, Roughly, That You Cannot Be Insured For The Accidents That Are Most Likely To Happen To You.

Democracy Consists Of Choosing Your Dictators, After They've Told You What You Think It Is You Want To Hear.

10.30 Newsnight: What Are The Chances Of World War Three Breaking Out After You Have Gone To Bed?

In The Days When The Keepers Of The House Shall Tremble, And The Strong Men Shall Bow Themselves, And The Grinders Cease Because They Are Few, And Those That Look Out Of The Windows Be Darkened, I Know One Boy Who Won't Be Sweating. I Intend To Raise My Coffin-lid Briskly, Throw A Few Things Into An Overnight Bag, And, Whistling Something Appropriate, Prepare To Meet My Maker.