The Way To Any Woman's Heart, Be

Wine Is Like Women. It Tempts You; It Comforts You; It Confuses You And Can Even Turn On You When You Least Expect It. It Can Be Your Friend One Day And Your Enemy The Next.

I Know People That Could Serve Me Canned Tuna And Saltine Crackers And Have Me Feel More At Home At Their Table Than Some People Who Can Cook Circles Around Me. The More You Try To Impress People, Generally The Less You Do.

I Have Nothing But Sympathy For The People Who Are Forced To Work With Me. I'm Better Now At Picking Out Those That Want To Play That Game With Me, And Those That Don't.

I Only Really Fake It Anymore With Sommeliers Who Are Being Really Snotty To Me And I Don't Want To Take Their Grief And So I Try To Do Something To Kind Of Throw Them Off Or Put Them On The Defensive, Even If I Don't Know What I'm Talking About

I Love To Have Battles Of The Wits With People That Can Dish Fast And Dirty - And It Leads To Problems Occasionally, 'cause I Can Sound Mean Without Attempting To Be Mean.