The More You Know, The Sadder You

There's Nothing Wrong With Being Gay. I Have Plenty Of Friends Who Are Going To Hell.

If Jesus Doesn't Have A Sense Of Humor, I Am In Huge Trouble.

The Trouble With The Jokes Is That Once They're Written, I Know How They're Supposed To Work, And All I Can Do Is Not Hit Them. I'm More Comfortable Improvising. If I Have Just Two Or Three Ideas And I Know How The Character Feels, What The Character Wants, Everything In Between Is Like Trapeze Work.

Researchers From Britain's Keele University Have Found That Swearing After An Injury May Help Alleviate Pain. Evidently, The Pain That You Feel Is Inversely Proportional To The Number Of Middle Names You Give Jesus.

The Only Thing That Gets Me High Is The Musky Scent Of My Enemy's Fear