The Easiest Thing To Do On Earth

Buttercup's Mother Hesitated, Then Put Her Stew Spoon Down. (this Was After Stew, But So Is Everything. When The First Man First Clambered From The Slime And Made His First Home On Land, What He Had For Supper That First Night Was Stew.)

Life Isn't Fair. It's Just Fairer Than Death, That's All.

Flailing And Thrashing, Buttercup Wept And Tossed And Paced And Wept Some More, And There Have Been Three Great Cases Of Jealousy Since David Of Galilee Was First Afflicted With The Emotion When He Could No Longer Stand The Fact That His Neighbor Saul's Cactus Outshone His Own. (originally, Jealousy Pertained Solely To Plants, Other People's Cactus Or Ginkgoes, Or, Later, When There Was Grass, Grass, Which Is Why, Even To This Day, We Say That Someone Is Green With Jealousy.) Buttercup's Case Rated A Close Fourth On The All-time List. It Was A Very Long And Very Green Night.

I Can't Keep My Head Above Water One Minute To The Next: It's Not Just The Parties And The Goo-gooing With What's-her-name, I've Got The Decide How Long The Five Hundredth Anniversary Parade Is Going To Be And Where Does It Start And When Does It Start And Which Nobleman Gets To March In Front Of Which Other Nobleman So That Everyone's Still Speaking To Me At The End Of It, Plus I've Got A Wife To Murder And A Country To Frame For It, Plus I've Got To Get The War Going Once That's All Happened, And All This Is Stuff I've Got To Do Myself. Here's What It All Comes Down To: I'm Just Swamped, Ty.

Is This A Kissing Book?