Saddam Hussein Is Hitler Like Oasis Was

I Never Hear Terrorists Say 'merry Christmas,' Only 'allahu Akbar'.

I Want To Thank Some Very Special People Without Whom I Would Not Be Here Today. George Bush, Sarah Palin And The Pope. When I Came To Hollywood In 1983, I Had One Dream. To Sleep With Jodie Foster. That Didn't Work Out, But This Is Nice, Too.

I Am So Tired Of Rearranging My Life Around What The Stupidest People Might Do.

There Is A Big Difference Between A Disappointing Friend And A Deadly Enemy. Of Course The Democrats Are Disappointing. That's What Makes Them Democrats. If They Were Any More Frustrating They'd Be Your Relatives. But In This Country They Are All That Stands Between You And Darkest Night. You Know Why Their Symbol Is The Letter 'd'? Because It's A Grade That Means Good Enough, But Just Barely. You Know Why The Republican Symbol Is 'r'? Because It's The Noise A Pirate Makes When He Robs You And Feeds You To A Shark.

[the Republicans] Are Always Asking The Muslims To Denounce Their Extremists. And I Agree With Them. But They Don't Take That Note And Do It Among Their Own. They Don't Denounce Their Own Extremists.