Never Have More Children Than You Have

The Fact Was I Didn't Want To Look My Age, But I Didn't Want To Act The Age I Wanted To Look Either. I Also Wanted To Grow Old Enough To Understand That Sentence.

My Son Would Walk To The Refrigerator-freezer And Fling Both Doors Open And Stand There Until The Hairs In His Nose Iced Up. After Surveying $200 Worth Of Food In Varying Shapes And Forms, He Would Declare Loudly, 'there's Nothing To Eat!'

Success Is Outliving Your Failures

People Are Always Asking Couples Whose Marriage Has Endured At Least A Quarter Of A Century For Their Secret For Success. Actually, It Is No Secret At All. I Am A Forgiving Woman. Long Ago, I Forgave My Husband For Not Being Paul Newman.

With Girls, Everything Looks Great On The Surface. But Beware Of Drawers That Won't Open. They Contain A Three-month Supply Of Dirty Underwear, Unwashed Hose, And Rubber Bands With Blobs Of Hair In Them.