My Wife Told Me That In The

Comedians Kind Of Write What Comes To Them. You Can Give Yourself Little Assignments, But It's What Inspires You.

You Ever Read An Article, And At The Bottom, It Says, 'continued On Page Six'? I'm , 'not For Me. I'm Done.'

How About Those People Who Don't Need Sleep? What Are They Called Again? Successful? What A Bunch Of Dicks They Are.

We Wrote About Having Five Kids And Bringing Them To Church. A Journalist At The Washington Post Wrote This Article Where The Headline Was "the New Catholic Evangelism Of Jim Gaffigan." And It Was A Bit Terrifying.

I Don't Know If I'm The Husky Guy, But I'm The Sexy Guy Who's A Good Kisser .