Liar: A Lawyer With A Roving Commission.

Immortality: A Toy Which People Cry For, And On Their Knees Apply For, Dispute, Contend And Lie For, And If Allowed Would Be Right Proud Eternally To Die For.

Quotient, N. A Number Showing How Many Times A Sum Of Money Belonging To One Person Is Contained In The Pocket Of Another - Usually About As Many Times As It Can Be Got There.

Responsibility, N. A Detachable Burden Easily Shifted To The Shoulders Of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck Or One's Neighbor. In The Days Of Astrology It Was Customary To Unload It Upon A Star.

Table D'hote, N. A Caterer's Thrifty Concession To The Universal Passion For Irresponsibility.

You Don't Have To Be Stupid To Be A Christian, ... But It Probably Helps.