It's Two Days Until Tax Time. I

The Night Before The Olympics Opening Ceremony, My Son, Who Is Eight Years Old, Gets Very Excited And Likes To Put Out A Plate Of Cookies And Some Milk For Bob Costas.

President Obama Is In China. Also In China Is Evil Russian Dictator Vladimir Putin. They're Both In China At The Same Time. It's Like Running Into Your Ex-girlfriend On Vacation.

Donald Trump May Be Running For President. He Said He Is Sick And Tired Of The Rest Of The World Laughing At The United States. Well, President Trump Will Certainly Put An End To That.

Arnold Is Now The Front Runner. Everyone Was Snickering About It A Month Ago, Now It Looks Like He Will Be The Next Governor Of California. He Is So Confident He Has Already Chosen A Body Oil For The Inauguration.

John Walker, While He Was In Afghanistan, Told People His Goal Was To Have Four Wives. ... Do We Need Any Further Proof That This Guy Is Out Of His Mind? Four Wives? That's How Al Qaeda Gets You To Become A Suicide Bomber.