It's A Great Day In America When

From Now On, We're Home Schooling You. Whatever We Don't Know, You Don't Know. When Did The Korean War Start? I Don't Know, And Neither Do You!

I Have Dogs In My House And Much Like Teenagers At Some Point, They Leave The Parents. Even Though They're In The Same House, They Live Independently. I Think That's How I Live With The Chihuahuas.

You Know How Mexican Restaurants Always Have "border" In The Name: Border Grill, Border Cafe. You Wouldn't Do That To Black People: Kunta's Kitchen Or Shackles. They Don't Do It To White People. You Don't See The Honkey Grill, The Cracker Barrel... Oh, Nevermind.

D.c. Is A Great Place. The Music, Jazz, Has Always Been Great Here, The Restaurants Have Always Been Fantastic Here. And There's Been A Lot Of Changes In This City Over The Last 30 Years, And All For The Better.

As Long As You're A Tax Deduction, You'll Always Be Safe In My House.