In Spite Of What Thomas Jefferson Wrote,

The Past Is A Ghost, The Future A Dream, And All We Ever Have Is Now.

Women Don't Want To Hear What You Think. Women Want To Hear What They Think - In A Deeper Voice.

No Matter How Calmly You Try To Referee, Parenting Will Eventually Produce Bizarre Behavior, And I'm Not Talking About The Kids. Their Behavior Is Always Normal.

If The Audience Knows You Can Be Funny When You Want To Be, They Will Be Willing To Wait For That Payoff.

It's More Blessed To Give Than To Receive - Especially Kittens.