In Golf, Humiliations Are The Essence Of

People In America, When Listening To Radio, Like To Lean Forward. People In Britain Like To Lean Back.

In The Best Of Times, Our Days Are Numbered Anyway. So It Would Be A Crime Against Nature For Any Generation To Take The World Crisis So Solemnly That It Put Off Enjoying Those Things For Which We Were Designed In The First Place: The Opportunity To Do Good Work, To Enjoy Friends, To Fall In Love, To Hit A Ball, And To Bounce A Baby.

The Scots Say That Nature Itself Dictated That Golf Should Be Played By The Seashore. Rather, The Scots Saw In The Eroded Sea Coasts A Cheap Battleground On Which They Could Whip Their Fellow Men In A Game Based On The Calvinist Doctrine That Man Is Meant To Suffer Here Below And Never More Than When He Goes Out To Enjoy Himself.

To Get An Elementary Grasp Of The Game Of Golf, A Human Must Learn, By Endless Practice, A Continuous And Subtle Series Of Highly Unnatural Movements, Involving About Sixty-four Muscles, That Result In A Seemingly Natural Swing, Taking Two Seconds To Begin And End.

A Professional Is Someone Who Can Do His Best Work When He Doesn't Feel Like It.