Illinois Is The Only State Where The

Apparently, There's Something Hinky About The New Iphones. They're Not Hooked Up Right. ... There's A Problem With The Antenna. They Don't Like To Be Held - Like My Ex-wife.

Let's Stop For A Moment To Admire The Rotating Pies.

Mitt Romney Had A Horse Competing In The Olympics. He Didn't Win. But Next Year, He'll Be Competing In 'dancing With The Stars.'

Today Is The Anniversary Of The Gettysburg Address. President Lincoln Wrote It On His Way To The Site Of The Speech On The Back Of An Envelope. One Guy On The Back Of An Envelope Wrote The Great Gettysburg Address - While Every Night It Takes Six Guys To Write This Crap!

Do I Think There Is A Heaven? Uh, Yeah I Do. Like A Really Big Gymnasium. How Do I See Myself There? With Really Bad Seats.