I Want A Dish To Taste Good,

When I Find Someone I Respect Writing About An Edgy, Nervous Wine That Dithered In The Glass, I Cringe. When I Hear Someone I Don't Respect Talking About An Austere, Unforgiving Wine, I Turn A Bit Austere And Unforgiving Myself. When I Come Across Stuff Like That And Remember About The Figs And Bananas, I Want To Snigger Uneasily. You Can Call A Wine Red, And Dry, And Strong, And Pleasant. After That, Watch Out.

Never Despise A Drink Because It Is Easy To Make And/or Uses Commercial Mixes. Unquestioning Devotion To Authenticity Is, In Any Department Of Life, A Mark Of The Naive - Or Worse.

If You Can't Annoy Somebody, There Is Little Point In Writing.

He Who Truly Believes He Has A Hangover Has No Hangover.

Hangover Cure: Rigorous Sex, Hydration, Hot Bath, Then "go Up For Half An Hour In An Open Aeroplane. (needless To Say, With A Non-hungover Person At The Controls)."