I Used To Date A Girl From

In The School I Went To, They Asked A Kid To Prove The Law Of Gravity And He Threw The Teacher Out Of The Window.

With Girls I Get No Respect. A Belly Dancer Told Me I Turned Her Stomach.

You Live With Life's Disappointments And Learn From Them. At Seventy-eight, I Know It All.

When My Wife Drives, There's Always Trouble. The Other Day She Took The Car. She Came Home. She Told Me, There's Water In The Carburetor. I Asked Her, Where's The Car? She Said, In A Lake.

When I Was 3 Years Old, My Parents Got A Dog. I Was Jealous Of The Dog, So They Got Rid Of Me.