I Tried Real Hard To Play Golf,

I Don't Know Why My Brain Has Kept All The Words To The Gilligan's Island Theme Song And Has Deleted Everything About Triangles.

You Might Be A Redneck If The Richest Member Of Your Family Bought A House And You Have To Help Take The Wheels Off Of It.

If Your Mother Doesn't Remove The Marlboro From Her Lips Before Telling The State Trooper To Kiss Her Ass, You Might Be A Redneck.

You Can Call Us Rednecks If You Want. We're Not Offended, 'cause We Know What We're All About. We Get Up And Go To Work, We Get Up And Go To Church, And We Get Up And Go To War When Necessary.

You Might Be A Redneck If You Think That The Styrofoam Cooler Is The Greatest Invention Of All Time.