I Think The Problem With People Like

And Now For Something Completely Different...

I'm Always Meeting New People, And My List Of Friends Seems To Change Quite A Bit.

The Americans All Love 'the Holy Grail', And The English All Love 'life Of Brian', And I'm Afraid On This One, I Side With The English.

There Are 3 Basic Differences Between We British And You Americans. One, We Speak English, And You Don't. Two, When We Have A "world Championship", We Invite Teams From Other Nations. Three, When You Meet The British Head Of State, You Only Have To Get Down On One Knee.

The One Thing I Remember About Christmas Was That My Father Used To Take Me Out In A Boat About Ten Miles Offshore On Christmas Day, And I Used To Have To Swim Back. Extraordinary. It Was A Ritual. Mind You, That Wasn't The Hard Part. The Difficult Bit Was Getting Out Of The Sack.